Tuesday, February 26, 2019

There have been two overwhelming themes (yes, overwhelming is the right word) to these last few weeks. The first is birthdays. Maren and Evelyn were both born in February and it seems like one party for each of them is never enough. Rather, we have to have the family party, and the school party, and the friends party, and sometimes another family party...you get the picture. Birthdays are wildly celebrated around here, taking up multiple weekends and requiring an inordinate amount of time and energy. To be honest, I don't really get it, but I guess that's just the way it is.

On top of this, however, we have the second major development- Rachel's week long trip to Texas to hang out with her extended family. It sounds like she had tons of fun and got to catch up with people who she hasn't seen in a while. Meanwhile, the kids and I (and a host of babysitters) held down the fort in Post Falls. I'm going to let Rach write about all this in a different post.


One of the things we did while Rachel was gone was visit the science museum in Spokane
*****

For now, let's talk about Evelyn.

Ev, as she is quick to remind us, is officially a "pre-teen." And I've got to say, at eleven years old she seems to be far more confident and responsible than her age would indicate. Also, she is way cooler than I ever was. These are good things, but as a parent I look at them with an uneasy sort of excitement. She has started to dip her toe in the world where fashion and boys and friend drama and cliques are all actual things, and just as I thought I was getting the hang of this "dad" thing I am realizing that I don't know if I have the tools I need to deal with this. Fortunately I am still "the coolest and best-looking dad," according to Evelyn, and her and her friends still let me in on their thoughts and actions. Those days though, I fear are limited. Evelyn is quickly becoming a young woman, and will soon be faced with decisions that I can't make for her, some of which can have some pretty real consequences. I am reminded of a song on Broadway- a duet sung by two parents of teenagers. It goes like this:

Does anybody have a map?
Anybody maybe happen to know how the hell to do this?
I don't know if you can tell
But this is me just pretending to know

So where's the map?
I need a clue
'Cause the scary truth is
I'm flying blind
And I'm making this up as I go

Yes, that song in pretty accurate. Oh, I realize that there are "maps" out there, but I lost confidence a long time ago in "one-size-fits-all" solutions, and finding the right map for the right set of circumstances seems to be the never-ending pursuit of parenting no matter who you are.

But here's the good thing: I trust Evelyn entirely. The truth is that my nervousness of what "might happen" with her is about on the same level as, say, getting in an airplane crash or having a child involved in a school shooting. You hear about these things and alarmists will tell you to be worried, but the truth is that they don't actually happen all that much. With Evelyn, I am mostly just excited to sit back and watch her as she continues to grow into herself. She is currently thriving in pretty much every way, and watching her navigate new challenges is met most of all with a mixture of parental pride and a small dose of amusement.

We had our family party for Ev last week and her big presents from us were a cell phone (yes, her very own Galaxy), and babysitting courses to provide her with a source of income above and beyond her regular allowance. She was very excited about both things.

Ev randomly asked me if I could get her a cantaloupe. I did, and this fruit princess was on our table that night for dinner.

*****

Yesterday we had Maren's "friends" party. She wanted to do it at our home, and to have a "bird" theme. I think we did well.



1 comment:

  1. February is a happy month for you guys because of all the happy birthday celebrations. Thanks for the pictures of the parties. It's not as good as being there, but it helps. Have a great week! We love you guys.

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