This year during the the commencement exercises at BYU, Elder L. Tom Perry spoke to the recent graduates. His message addressed an issue that is a continual challenge for me, as well as one that has blessed my life with purpose and direction. The topic? Balance.

See, I DO stuff. Boredom has never really been a part of my life. Instead, some of the hardest decisions I have ever made have been what NOT to do. What not to major in (they all looked so interesting), what not to read (there is so much good literature out there), what schools not to attend (they each had their own strengths), and which places not to live (so many beautiful areas) have all been hard choices for me to make.

But it gets worse. Not only do I want to do EVERYTHING, but I want to do it all well. I don't just want to be a good husband, but I want to be the guy who spends tons of time with his wife, continually surprising her with fun ideas and engaging her in constant dialogue. At the same time I want to be an awesome dad- the dad who kids listen to because they respect him, but at the same time, the dad who all the other kids wished they had because I do cool stuff with them and take them cool places and treat them like real people and not just pets. While doing this, I totally have ambitions to be one of the best dentists in the state of Idaho, if not the entire country. I hope, one day, to be teaching other dentists through my writing and through lectures, how to do their jobs better and give the best possible care to their patients. Oh- and I also want to have a highly successful business, with several different offices and dozens of employees. But not just dental offices- oh no. I also want to own a sandwich shop, a real-estate company, and an international non-profit organization to provide health care and educational opportunities for those who lack the proper resources to pursue these things on their own. In my community, I want to be highly involved in organizations such as the LDS church, the chamber of commerce, and the rotary club. Along some of these same lines, I would like to get involved in local politics one day so that I can further serve those who share this beautiful part of the country with me. And of course, while I am doing all of this I will want to maintain my hobbies. I want to rock climb like Chris Sharma, play the guitar like Tommy Emmanuel, and build motorcycles like Tony Stark (just kidding on this last one...sort of). I also want to train for and complete the Coeur d'Alene IronMan. Besides these hobbies, I hope to continue my education with further degrees- one in History, one in Philosophy, and one in Music. And, although I surely have a lot on my plate, I need to remember every day to do my exercises, scripture study, social networking, and leisure reading. I also need to take a few minutes a day to relax and do nothing.

Whew! So, that sort of gets things started. I could go on, but I won't. And the thing is that I am totally, one hundred percent serious about each one of these things. At the same time, I realize that they probably won't all happen- can't happen. Because unfortunately these things all take TIME. Time that I don't have. But I will still go after them. It's what I do- make impossible goals and hope to end up somewhere close to where I was aiming. 

But getting back to my original point: Balance. It is hard sometimes to decide which things to allocate my time to and which ones to hold off on. Some things are obvious- Family and Faith come first. I also try to make sure I am always doing something in the other categories as well- Self, Community, Business, and Profession. But it really is a challenge. So, I guess I've just got to say thanks to good ol' L. Tom for the timely message (We've been on a first initial basis every since seminary. I can't say why.). 

Anyway- let's back up a little and go over the week. We had Evelyn's open house where she got to show us her class room and some of the projects she has been working on. Addy and Jackson's pre-school is in full swing as well and they are enjoying it. Maren is crazy- in a good way. Except for when she is throwing food because that's not so good. Rachel is working hard at interpreting and advertising for our business. She also teaches pre-school, does Achievement Days for our ward, and keeps our home from self-destructing. 

As for me- I'm just doing my best to stay balanced.

(Sorry- no pictures this week)

So...It's been a couple of crazy weeks for Rachel. Here's the story.

Remember a couple of weeks how I said that Rachel had gotten that dream job? If not, then go back and review. It was a great job. She was stoked. Well- she totally aced the interview and they told her that the job was hers contingent on a successful background check. Knowing that she had no "skeletons in the closet," Rachel happily assumed that she was home free.

Well, a little over a week ago she got a phone call from Sorenson (her employer) informing her that a background check revealed a complete lack of the college degrees that she had claimed on her application. A little irritated, Rachel explained that there must be some mistake. She would call the college that she graduated from right away and figure things out.

She called the college. Here's where the bad news hit. They had no record of her graduation! According to them, she had not received a degree! What's more, her records didn't even show that she had an Associate degree. At this point she started panicking a little. What? No degree? What about graduation? What about Summa Cum Laude? What about her job that she got as a teacher after she finished school? This misunderstanding was getting out of hand. Frantically, she made a few more phone calls, and the bad news was only confirmed. She had no degrees. None. Academically, she was back to square one- high school graduation.

How could this happen? The school she graduated from (UVU) said it was because her Bachelor degree hinged on the Associate that was transferred up from another school (SLCC). Apparently, they didn't double check on the transferred degree until after graduation, at which time they found a discrepancy (and conveniently forgot to tell Rachel). Basically, the Associate didn't transfer, so she couldn't get the Bachelor.

OK...But why didn't the Associate degree transfer? And why was she cleared for graduation by UVU before they had ensured the completion of all the required coursework? While we still don't know the answer to the second question, the first was quickly resolved by calling SLCC. They politely informed Rachel that the Associate was never transferred because she never earned it. What?! Why the heck not? Well, it looked like she never completed a freshman level sign language course. Never mind that Rachel had actually taken the class. Never mind that this course was a required prerequisite to virtually every other class on Rachel's transcript. The papers said she hadn't taken it, so that was that. Oh- and just in case you were wondering, it is a class that could not be tested out of (even though Rachel is now a nationally certified sign language interpreter), nor could it be taken online. The only way to get credit for the class would be to physically attend SLCC for another semester.

So, basically what is came down to was that Rachel didn't have an Associate or a Bachelor degree because the papers said that she never took an intro-to-sign-language course. And just like that- 5 years of hard work was gone. Dream job- gone. Dreams of going back to school for her Masters- gone. Credentials for future employment- gone. Done. And just to rub salt in the wound, when Rachel explained all of this to Sorenson (future employer), they informed her that she would NEVER, EVER be able to apply for a job with them again, even if she did get the degrees back, because she had committed the unpardonable sin- falsification and manipulation of information on her application.

Rachel was devastated.

She spent a lot of time on the phone in the next few days and weeks. She petitioned her case to the highest possible place at both schools. She explained, pleaded, begged, argued, fought, re-explained, negotiated, and talked with pretty much anyone who would listen. She was desperate.

And you know what? It worked.

It was tense for a while, but it finally ended up working. She will officially graduate in December of this year. So, Congratulations Rachel!

Oh- and about the job. She totally got it. She'll be starting in January.

Phew! What a scare.

Anyway. Other than that, things have been going really great. Here are some pictures.

I got a new guitar. I LOVE it. It's a Fender Strat. Beautiful. Simply Beautiful. Rachel told me I need to engrave the back of it with five simple words- "I love my wife more." I think she was only half joking.

The rest of these pictures of photos we found of Addy and Jack's birthday party. Rachel did a superhero theme. This, of course, is the cake. 

She made capes for all the kids with their initials sewn into them. Still, some opted to wear the ones they brought instead. Also, each kid made a superhero mask upon arrival to the party.

The heroes in silhouette. I did the cityscape. In case you didn't notice, it's Cleveland. I think it's pretty good.

Flying over the city!

They got lots of cool presents for their birthday, but their favorites are the bikes that Rachel and I got for them. Also, I don't usually look like a possessed demon. Only sometimes.

If you are a mom or a dad, or a grandma or grandpa, or a kid or a teacher, or have ever been a kid once upon a time, then you have probably, at some point, read this book. It is a classic. Here is an excerpt:

The baby grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was two years old, and he ran all around the house. He pulled all the books off the shelves. He pulled all the food out of the refrigerator and he took his mother's watch and flushed it down the toilet. Sometimes his mother would say, "this kid is driving me CRAZY!"

I have something to say to the mom in this book- come stay at our house for one hour and then you will realize how easy you really have it. I mean, honestly, how easy would it be if there was only one child to keeps tabs on? And a two-year-old at that! Seriously- put the books up high, lock all the closets, don't leave your watch laying around, and close the bathroom door. Problem solved- these are easy solutions. See, when she comes to our house she will immediately realize that she is way, WAY out of her league.

Here is the story that we would tell:

Once upon a time, a mom had a one-year-old. And a three-year-old. And another three-year-old. And a conniving too-smart-for-her-own-good five-year-old. This mom did everything right, but the kids made a plan. This plan was carefully constructed to expose the enemies weakness. They called it the "Hazard Child Reign of Terror," and it was highly effective.

First, the two three-year-olds threw rocks and pillows at the pictures that were hanging up downstairs until they fell off the wall. They then proceeded to break them apart (also with rocks) and spread the pieces around the room. Thus, having successfully created a barrier of glass shards around themselves, they feel safe in taking a box of crayons to the windows, walls, television, and handcrafted furniture. Phase 1: complete.

Enter the five-year-old. She comes and tells mom and dad what is going on downstairs. When the parents go to investigate, she quickly sneaks into her parents room (which she knows is off-limits), gets a chair, and takes her dad's really nice electric guitar. She quickly drags the instrument outside and promptly and deliberately drops it off the deck, permanently breaking it along with a small portion of her father's heart. Phase 2: complete.

Dad is too shocked and upset to give any sort of level-headed discipline right now, so mom goes out to pick up the shattered remains of the guitar. Unfortunately, three-year-old "A" beats her to the prize, and defends it fiercely by wielding a large stick and threatening to hit his mother if she gets too close. The five-year-old, in the meantime, is loudly proclaiming her innocence in the whole affair. Unable to manage both children at once, mom calls for back-up. This succeeds in getting both parents outside. Phase 3: complete.

While Mom and Dad are thus occupied, three-year-old "B" quickly runs back upstairs, into her parents room, and hides under their bed. While there, she sees Mom and Dad's fireproof safe with all their important stuff in in. A smile starts to form.  Doing some quick calculations, she decides that her parents will be occupied long enough to give her the time she needs to carry out her task. Just to be sure, however, she goes out to the kitchen, gets a chair, and unlocks the pantry. She then opens all the doors to the bathroom, and calls the one-year-old in for her part. Only then does she go back into the parent's room, lock herself in, and begin looking for a key.

Meanwhile, three-year-old "A" and five-year-old mastermind have successfully detained their parents in the back yard by inserting small rocks into the central-air conditioning unit until it no longer functions. Thus occupied, Mom and Dad are not even aware of anything going on in the house until they see the one-year-old come out onto the deck, soaking wet and holding a toilet plunger. They run inside only to find that the kitchen pantry has been emptied, as well as the entire contents of all the bathrooms. Oh- and Mom's brand new cell-phone is sitting at the bottom of a toilet, kept company by several toys, Dad's electric toothbrush, and a large white onion. 

Mom and Dad decide to put all children into their rooms- except that three-year-old "B" has mysteriously gone missing. And then they find her, sitting atop a pile of "treasures" that were once safely secured under the bed. Many of the papers are colored on or torn, including the title to their new car, Dad's college diploma from BYU, and his Idaho Dental License. Mom and dad have had it. The put the kids in their rooms and lock the doors so that they can clean the mess and regain some of their sanity. Phase 4: complete.

Now that the kids have ensured their privacy (Mom and Dad don't want anything to do with them at this point), they begin to work on their windows. First come the blinds, in pieces. Then the glass. Then the screens. Freedom, sweet freedom. Phase 5: complete.

After about a half hour, Mom and Dad have finally pieced the house together. They sit on the couch and rub their temples, trying to hold on to whatever remnants of sanity might still remain. Then they note that the house is actually pretty quiet. Very quiet, in fact. They relish the silence for just a half second until they realize that the house is too quiet to be natural. They share a look of dread and start rushing downstairs to check on the children, but are stopped by a knock on the door.

When they open the door, they see their neighbor standing there. Behind them are their three children. Naked. Stark naked. "I found your kids playing in my front yard. I though you might want them back," he says. He then rolls his eyes and gives a look of disgust as the parents usher them all back into the house. As he leaves, he mutters under his breath that he can take care of his (only) child- why can't they do the same.

Later that night after the kids were sentenced to hard manual labor and solitary confinement...

It is 10:30. All the kids are asleep. Finally. Before retiring to their bed, the mom and the dad both go in and see their children asleep in their rooms. They aren't nearly as scary when they're sleeping. Each child gets a gentle kiss, a warm smile, and a tight hug. Despite the day's events, Mom and Dad go to bed supremely happy that God has blessed them with four such amazing children.

The End.


PS: This story pretty much sums up our week.

We also had Addy and Jack's birthday party on Friday. Unfortunately, they got a hold of the camera and erased all the pictures. Just know that there have been brief- very brief- moments of peace and harmony scattered throughout this crazy week.

I finished last week's blog with Donny's visit to our house. It was fun having him here. One of the highlights of the visit for me was going down to the RV dump and watching him clean out the toilets from a big trip he had just finished. Man- you could not pay me enough to do that on a regular basis! I won't get too into it here, because it wouldn't be appropriate, but whatever sentence I would write about it would require the use of the words squirt, splatter, and revolting. I guess I can technically say that I helped since I turned the water on and off for him, but for the most part I just tried to stay out of the way (literally). 

Anyway, here's a call out to all the engineers who might be reading this- if you can invent a better toilet system for the river, then you WILL have buyers. There's not a huge niche for it I suppose, which is probably why it hasn't been done yet- but someone has got to do something. Seriously. Here are the qualifications:

• The system must be portable enough that it can be taken on and off a raft on a regular basis.
• The system must seal itself well enough that it can be shaken vigorously (or go off a waterfall) without causing major problems people sitting around it.
• It must be able to be thoroughly emptied/cleaned without the requirement of a HAZMAT uniform.
• It can not use disposable bags/boxes- I guess enough people have left these bags behind that many rivers do not allow them any more.

Okay. I hope I haven't ruined your day by making you read that. And despite that escapade, we did do some fun stuff with Donny. We had a family trip to Cabella's where Jackson got lost. That was exciting. We also went rock climbing in the rain (reminiscent of a few "classic" trips I can think of), and had a lot of fun at the house with the kids. One night we had a camp fire and told stories about past trips. The kids all had a good time with him, and they are hoping to see him again sometime soon.

But that's not all that happened this week. Not by a long shot. Besides the great weekend we had, Evelyn has now been through her first week of kindergarten! She is so big and was very excited to get on the bus and go to school. She has already made lots of friends, and she likes her teacher, Mrs. Juliano. She says she hasn't started homework yet, but she really wants to. She is most excited to learn about reading, and she is already anticipating a party her class will have in a couple of months. The part she likes the least is the half-hour nap that her teacher makes the class take every day. (I have to say I would agree. With all the griping teachers do about having too much stuff to teach, it seems they would take advantage of the time a little better than forced boredom. Seriously, Evelyn grew out of nap time years ago).

One other thing about Evelyn. She is smart! Yesterday Rachel decided to do an activity in our driveway where the kids traced their outlines onto paper and then colored them. Well, Evelyn traced her outline, and then proceeded to draw diagrams of the circulatory and digestive systems. As far as I could tell, they were anatomically accurate (for a 5 year old), and included parts such as the aortic arch, small intestines, large intestines, arteries, and veins. I have no idea where she learned this, but when I asked her to talk me through it she made it clear that she knew what she was talking about. I am impressed, proud, and a little worried. I hope her teacher is ready for her.

As for Addy and Jack- they turn the big oh-four tomorrow. It is fun to watch them grow more and more, but sort of crazy as well. Four years!? How? When? Time goes so fast. Some relatives have been asking what they want for presents. Well, I asked them and Jackson said he wants a motorcycle and Addy finally decided on a pet mermaid. Since Rachel and I aren't planning on getting them any of these things, you are welcome to send them in the mail if you want. Good luck.

Maren- the poor girl is teething. At least that's what I would like to blame. She has recently taken up screaming like a banshee and throwing anything she can reach. Today in church her nursery teacher brought her to me during class. The teacher looked like she had just been in a fight. Maren looked like a demon possessed child from a well-done horror film. It was a bit unnerving. Currently she is literally writing on the floor, rolling around in circles and whimpering like an injured animal. I hope this passes soon.

So, that covers Evelyn, Addy, Jack, and Maren. Now it's time for Rachel.

Rachel got some very exciting news this week. She applied for a job with Sorenson a while back and she found out that she got it! For those who don't know, this is a telephone interpreting service. Since they never know what kind of calls will be coming in they require very highly qualified interpreters, and it is a tribute to Rachel's skill that she got the job at all. Oh- I should also mention that they pay very well. Like- Rachel could make more than me if she wanted to- and I'm a dentist. But that's not even the best part. The best part is that Rachel totally gets to set her own schedule. She can work as much or as little as she wants, and whenever she wants. According to Rachel, it is like a very intimidating dream job that she is excited to jump into. In a couple of weeks they are flying  her our to Portland for an all-expenses-paid training trip. The next weekend is the same. I know that Rachel loves interpreting and I am so proud of her for doing this.

Other than that, life goes on as normal. Business is good. Family is good. As for me-I've been playing the guitar a lot lately.

I. Love. The. Guitar.

Alright. Have a great week!

Two people, dressed and ready for the day. This is Evelyn's first day of school.

We start them young. Jack has the tongue thing going- he may have a future in a rock band.

This is Evelyn. On Tuesday she is going to her first day of kindergarten. On Friday I went to the store with her and we bought all of her school stuff. It's all pretty crazy- it doesn't seem like she's old enough for school yet. At the same time, however, it seems like it has taken forever for this day to come. She has been ready for this for a long time.

Besides getting ready for school, there hasn't been a whole lot going on this week. Rachel wrote in our last post about the hectic month of August and we are still trying to catch our breaths.

Yesterday we all went to the discovery park for a while. They have a pretty good sized rock wall there for the kids to climb on, and our kids all did a great job. The only downside was when Addy, with the trust that only a child could have, totally flung herself off the top into my arms without giving me any warning. Keep in mind that the wall was about 10 feet high. I caught her, but sort of hit her in the face in doing so. I told her I was sorry. She hugged me, and between sobs said "That's okay- even papas make mistakes sometimes." Dang. Kids aren't supposed to know that until they are teenagers, right?

Yesterday my cousin, Donny, called. He had just finished running a nearby river and was wondering if he could come stay with us for a while. Of course! The kids were all excited to see him too, and I don't think they have left him alone for a minute since he arrived. I have the day off work tomorrow for Labor Day, so we'll go do something fun.

Well, that was pretty much our week. I also want to mention that I have been maintaining another blog called "Logan's Podium" at loganspodium.blogspot.com. It is mostly a writing exercise for me, but if you are interested in seeing what some of my deeper views on things are, then you can either follow that blog or check in from time to time for new content. If you do, then make sure you read "A letter to my readers" on the side bar.