The Hazard Chronicles

This week I learned how amazing Rachel is. Yesterday (Saturday) she went down to Kent State for a day-long interpreter conference. She had a great time. Meanwhile, I was at home with the kids. At first I was looking forward to it, but then things started to go downhill pretty fast.

Just after breakfast Evelyn and the babies were playing with their play kitchen. I was cleaning up breakfast, when out of the corner of my eye I saw Evelyn straining with all her might to tip the whole thing over on top of Jack and Addy. I tried to say no, but the words caught in my throat as I realized that I was just one second too late. The whole thing came down and there was nothing I could do to stop it. Jack and Addy were squirming around under it and crying, and Evelyn was doing a little victory dance along with a very high pitched happy song/war-cry and I was running and trying to make sure that nobody was too badly injured. What a way to start the day.

Later, after Jackson and Adalie woke up from their morning naps, I had them in their high chairs to eat. I had given them their food and things were all under control, so I decided to check my email while I waited for them to finish their snacks. It must have been only about 10 seceonds before Jack let out a wild scream, followed by Evelyn saying in a very sweet voice "I'm sorry Jackson." I went to investigate and before my eyes I found Evelyn holding a steak knife (where did THAT come from?) and Jackson with blood coming from his EYE. Yeah- I freaked out. A quick evaluation showed that the knife had not actually pierced the eye, but had made a neat little incision about 2 milimeters below it- a little bit too close for comfort if you ask me.

Finally, I decided to get out of the house. We needed groceries so I decided to go to the store. Well, it turns out that Evelyn didn't like the store. She wanted to go somewhere else. And she was going to let the whole world know about it. The whole time we were there she was throwing a tantrum- Literally screaming at the top of her lungs that I had gotten the wrong cheese, or that she wanted yogurt, or that she wanted out of the cart, or that she wanted back in the cart, or that she didn't want Jackson and Addy to go in with us, or a hundred other things that just weren't acceptable to her in her own little Evelyn-centered universe. It was basically a disaster. I got a lot of sympathetic looks from strangers, and a few rude ones as well. I also got a very interesting look when she calmed down just long enough to look a stranger in the eye, and then very clearly articulate that "I have an owie on my bum." That is our sweet girl. I wanted to strangle her.

But the story isn't over yet. Determined not to let her win this one, I pushed her all around the store for the better part of an hour, throwing the groceries I needed into the cart as I ran through the aisles. Forget about comparison shopping- This was survival shopping and I just wanted out as quickly as I could. Finally I got to the check-out counter and they rang up my total, but when I looked in my wallet there was no card to pay with. Rachel had taken it to the conference with her. I searched for any back-up options, but came up empty. Finally I just told the cashier that I was sorry and that I felt like a total idiot with the word loser stamped on my forehead but that I had no money and couldn't pay for the groceries. Talk about embarassing. Just lock me in a room- or better, a padded white cell.

When we got home from that fiasco I put them to bed and just sat on the couch and contemplated how amazing Rachel is. Not only does she do this every day, but she finds fun outings for them to go on, is a part of various groups, and somehow cleans the house in between all the madness. Oh, and did I mention she teaches pre-school?

Pre-school. I think I talked about it once before. It is a co-op that Rachel is doing with five other moms. This weeks was her week, meaning that besides our three adorable children, she also had FIVE others to deal with- the oldest of which just turned three. She did an amazing job, of course. I'm telling you, sometimes I think she is from another planet where kid-management just sort of happens naturally. It is crazy what she can accomplish.

As for our "adult" activities this week, some friends watched our kids on Friday night and Rachel and I went to the Ingenuity Fest. It was in this old subway tunnel that was partially over a bridge overlooking the city and partially underground. It was actually pretty cool. There were live bands and street performers and weird artsy exhibits and colored lights lighting the tunnel. Very "ingenious," and a lot of fun. My favorite part was the street magician who made three oranges and a cantalope "appear" out of nothing. I still can't quite get my head around that one.

Here we are at the Inginuity Festival.

Here are the projects that Evelyn made at pre-school this week. Obviously, she had a very creative teacher.

And here she is playing dentist. She loves doing this. I don't understand why anyone would want to look in someone else's mouth. Gross!

Sometimes you just miss the moment and realize it can never be recovered.