"You must be busy"

It is Saturday afternoon and Logan and I are out and about with the kids.  We arrive at Wal-mart in style in our light green Toyota Sienna mini-van.  So far this is a pretty normal occurrence at this family friendly store.  Then we walk to the side doors and out stream our sweet kids.  First an infant car seat emerges, followed by one, two, three, oh wait, four young children (with a six year old as the oldest).  We troupe to the front door and the children separate into two carts, each manned by one ready adult.  Let the sweet looks from grandparents, alarmed looks from other parents, sidelong glances, and encouraging sentiments begin!

We have found that these trips can be a sure set up for failure, or they can be a complete success. The outcome is almost fully dependent on if all of the kids are fed and rested. If these simple requirements are satisfied it is pretty smooth sailing.  If one or both are lacking the results can be pretty spectacular...

We have received a wide array of comments.  Some of my favorite include: "This is why God created grandpas" (from a sweet old man who was smiling at Lindsey), "Are you trying to recreate the Brady bunch?" (to which I sweetly responded that this was not the case because all of them were mine), and "You must be an amazing mom!"  The two comments I can count on pretty regularly are "Wow! You must be busy!" and "You must not have any free time!" Providing a response to these comments will do a great job at summing up our lives right now.

"Wow! You must be busy!"

The short answer to this comment is "Yes we are, and I wouldn't have it any other way!" I confess that I have a slight addiction to having a daily schedule.  I know exactly when I have workout time, laundry day, cleaning time, momma day, mommy time, quiet time, afternoon yoga, etc. Logan did a great job of summing up our  busy lives in our last post dated January 17^th.

"You must not have any free time!"

I am a stay at home mom with five kids and by all accounts ‘me time’ seems like it should be an elusive idea.  Surprisingly though, sometimes I feel like I have more than my fair share.

This is due, in part, to my scheduling prowess. My day begins at 6:00 when I wake up to have some time for myself before kids are up.  Lindsey’s overnight feeding schedule has recently adjusted allowing me to do this again (Waking up at 6:00 is difficult when combined with nighttime feeding). Morning time lately has been about catching up with current events, reading my book for book club, facebook, and anything else that sounds enjoyable.  

All of this is generally done while listening to the familiar sounds of Logan practicing the guitar in the background. He is now working on Sweet Child of Mine and he is sounding AMAZING.  Morning time is a time where each of us have our own individual time. Occasionally though, a great topic will come up and we will find ourselves in a good conversation.

During the week I workout 3 times at the Kroc center, have playgroups with the kids and my friends, have ladies night, enjoy a monthly book club, and I work 2 afternoons each week as a video relay interpreter for Sorenson. I feel like my sanity levels are very balanced, and this allows me to enjoy being a mom even more!  I feel like I can be more present and be a better mom when I have time outside of the home and time specifically for me.  I also enjoy momma time most afternoons. Things are just better after a relaxing yoga session and in a clean house (these two definitely don’t always happen, but it is oh so nice when they do!).  Doing things with the kids is not confined to that time, but I know it will happen if I have a specific time for it.

Logan and I are also in a good place.  Every day after 8:00 is time for each other. We fill this time with reading our book together (right now we are reading 1984 and this is something like our 75^th book that we have read out loud together), engage in a good conversation about current events, philosophy, random topics, etc, or watch a movie.  We are also back to our weekly date nights.

The good, the bad and the ugly

So far I feel like I have been standing on a bit of a soap box exclaiming about sunshine and rainbows.  We have plenty of those in our lives, but there is definitely another side.  Let’s rewind the story…

…We troupe into Wal-mart where the kids separate into two carts each manned by a ready adult…

In this story the parents end up frantically hurrying through the isles to the sound of one child sobbing, one child screaming, one child yelling “He HIT me!,” and one child vehemently denying that any wrongdoing occurred.  I left one child out of this scenario as a kind of hopeful idea that one of them was behaving.  This scene honestly would probably include the youngest toddler jumping off of the cart (because this is Walmart, and seat belt is broken) and running in the opposite direction we are walking.  

Yes.  This happens.  I can normally predict the trips that will be horrible because the kids are tired, hungry, or just done being out and about.  Admittedly they are all becoming much better to take places and are getting better at being polite and well behaved.  However, just the sheer number of them makes things difficult and a decibel louder than a normal level. This just comes with the territory of a large young family.

Now let us go back to our home which is always clean and relaxing.  Okay, I admit that the house I am referring to is actually someone else’s house.  The house we return to is wild and crazy!  I have my cleaning time set aside in the afternoon right before kid time.  There is a reason for this. I think the kids can happily mess up a house in a matter of minutes, and if the house is messy there is some kind of switch inside of my body that makes me grumpy and reduces my fuse by a few inches. As an aside, another time this switch rears its ugly head is after our kids are read to, teeth brushed, sung to, and tucked sweetly in bed… And one or more of them do not stay there or become very needy.  

The bottom line is that life is very good right now.  Logan and I both feel very balanced, and we are both enjoying the ride. We love the way our lives are shaping up and we are enjoying the intentional process of creating the family traditions that we want to shape our family.

Sometimes the house gets messy and very loud. Sometimes children fight. On the other hand, Logan and I are best friends, our children are best friends, we are constantly developing personal relationships with each child, the kids imaginations are amazing, we have a LOT of family time together, we love to be together, and we all love each other deeply.  

I wouldn't have it any other way. :)

Logan took this picture of us doing Cosmic Kids Yoga together.  Check it out on youtube.

Busy. Balanced. Fulfilling. Fun.

These are the words I would use to describe our lives right now.

Busy

Our lives are crazy- and we like it that way. Here is a little bit of what we have been up to:

Last Weekend: I was in Kentucky for a work conference on Thurs-Sat. This was a great conference that was mostly just fun and games. Lots of live entertainment (music and comedy). Lots of good food. Lots of new friends. Very little work.

Last Sun: Church- Rachel went early to prep and then interpreted the service. Later, we brought out our projector and watched the CFP championship game between Oregon and Ohio. It was a disappointing game, even though the right team won. We topped the night off with our family dance and dessert night.
Mon: Addy and Jack Preschool. Rachel worked. Family Night.
Tues: Rachel had a 'Momma morning' with the kids. Rachel and I worked. Potluck party at our house with friends that night. Lots of people and good conversation.
Wednesday: I worked. Addy and Jack had preschool. Play-date day for Maren/Lindsey. That evening we went to a party at Rachel's work and met her co-workers/friends there. Rachel got to reconnect with her first interpreting teacher from Utah. Date night afterwords at my favorite Mexican restaurant.
Thursday: I worked. Thursdays are Kroc Center nights where I meet up with a group of climbers to set/work on new routes while Rachel works out. Kids have fun at the play place.
Friday: I worked (I placed an implant that day. I like doing implants). As soon as we got home, Rachel and I went on a double date with some new friends and had a great 3-hour conversation that we would have continued if we hadn't had to get back for the babysitter. We are definitely getting together with them again.
Saturday: In the morning we went to the "Family Fun Fair" at the high school- but it wasn't very fun so we went to the play place at the mall instead. When we got back we babysat our friend's 3 kids for the rest of the day so that they could spend time together for her birthday.
Sunday: Church- Rachel went early to prep, and then interpreted the service. Rachel was asked if she would be an interpreting mentor for her colleague. That afternoon we went out to watch the Seahawks game. Definitely one of the best football games I have ever watched. We are already looking forward to the super-bowl party. We finished up the evening with hide and seek in the dark and family dessert night.

Balance
I think that Rachel is going to do a blog post about this in more depth. Suffice it to say that we not only have a lot going on, but we have a lot of diversity.

Physical: We both work out at a gym 3-4 days/week. Besides this, I have my climbing night which moves outdoors as soon as weather permits, and Rachel does afternoon yoga during the kid's quiet time.
Mental/Personal Development: I practice the guitar an hour each morning before anyone wakes up and this is my "creative time" for myself. Rachel is part of a book club. We also both read and listen to A LOT of material (current events, fiction, and non-fiction) and have A LOT of great in-depth conversations about a broad range of topics. Those who know us won't be surprised to find recurring themes in politics and philosophy.
Social: The above list of events should demonstrate this better than anything. Rarely a week goes by that we don't have a very full social calendar. Rachel is part of a moms group that has a variety of weekly playdates, mom's nights, and date nights with the husbands.  She is making a lot of friends there.
Professional: We are both thriving and at the top of our games in our different career tracks. We both work for great companies that we could stay with for a long time. We are both highly credentialed in our skill-sets and doing specialized work in our fields. We both feel like we are doing things that challenge us and that we absolutely love, and it is easy for us to enjoy our jobs.
Financial: This pretty much follows from the things mentioned above. We are very comfortable.
Family: I love our family traditions! From daily "morning message" and story time to weekly family nights, scheduled activities, dessert nights, mama days, and papa days- we do a lot together and I feel like we are all growing very close. Rachel has time set aside each afternoon to be specifically with the kids and nothing else, and this has been fun for everyone. The kids just seem to get awesomer and awesomer as they grow up.
Spiritual: This one is pretty personal, so I won't go too into depth. I think it's adequate to say though that in our own ways we both feel more at peace with ourselves and with the universe than we have for a very long time.

Fulfilling
It seems to me that a lot of people talk about being happy. And I am that. I am very happy. But more important to me, I feel that life is very fulfilling for us right now. Personal integrity means a lot to me, and I feel like we are both able to live very authentically right now. What's more, is that the authentic "us" is doing really well. I don't really want to dwell on this too much because it seems somewhat self-aggrandizing, but we are both very pleased with the things we have chosen to be involved with, the decisions we are making, and the direction things seem to be headed. Life really is pretty spectacular.

Fun
Like I said before- our lives are crazy and we like it that way! Sometimes, when we are all together I am afraid that we can give the impression that things are totally out of control. The truth is that this only happens about half of the time :). The other half though is full of good times and I treasure that. I realize that the big family lifestyle doesn't fit everyone, but it sure seems to suit us well. I genuinely look forward to doing things and having conversations with my kids. If I had to choose anyone to spend forever with then it would be Rachel and my family without any second thoughts whatsoever. I think Rachel and I are both glad that we have so much else to help round us out, but in the end our family is what it's all about.

Anyway- I could get all sappy and write a lot. I already feel like this whole post is too full of sunshine and rainbows (I chose those symbols on purpose), and it's not my intent to imply that things are absolutely perfect. Of course we have a lot of fighting and crying, and things that break and bills to pay and other struggles as well. We are, after all, just a normal big family living a pretty normal big-family life. Right now though, things honestly just seem really, really good. I'm lovin' it.

This is the only picture I have to share. This morning, Evelyn got up early and made these stick puppets for everyone as a morning surprise (all totally her own idea). Each person has a White person and a Black person on a stick, and they are all smiling. She explained to us that they were all playing together. I think she has been learning about MLK in her class :)

This week...

We went sledding...

 ...and broke a sled.

The kids decided to make a band after watching "That Thing You Do." I really hope this comes to fruition in their later years :).

I especially liked Jackson's drum set. He worked hard on this and has been practicing with it all week.

Evelyn recognizes the need for every good rock and roll guitarist to have a signature style. Personally, I like her choice.

The kids discovered that we have an intercom system in our house. Bed times have become much more difficult as a result.

Rachel's family night lesson on goal setting. I thought this was a cute idea. And yes, I just used the word "cute." You should be proud of me.

I came home from work and Jack had hung signs all over our house. It turns out they were warning signs. Some of my favorites are found below:

Don't be sad on Christmas

Don't cry during family night

Don't walk under exploding volcanos

Evelyn decided to make a sign too.

It has been a wonderful Christmas vacation.

For a long time we had been planning on going down to Utah for the holidays to spend time with Rachel's family. Unfortunately, due to conflicting work schedules this ended up not working out very well for us. Instead, we decided to spend Christmas at home with just our family, and visit the Utah folk at a later time (I think we decided on February?). Anyway- this is something we had not done before, and what started out as a let down turned into a lot of excitement as we realized that we could, for the first time, be one hundred percent in charge of what Christmas was going to be like for our family.

Now, I'm not totally sure how to make this an interesting narrative to read. Basically, we had a great vacation. I had six days off work and the kids weren't in school and we made the best of it.

On the day before Christmas Eve we went to a church for a big candlelight ceremony thing that was actually pretty neat. They had good music and they did a demonstration where one person lit a candle who then, in turn lit other people's candles, and so on. It was neat to see how quickly the 2,000 or so people in attendance were all holding flaming candles, and it was a good way to share a positive message.

This isn't the thing we went to- but it was sort of like this. (I think this is a picture of a candlelight vigil for a fallen protester or something. I found it on Google.)

The next day (Christmas Eve) we had our big dinner that everyone helped to make. Afterwords, the kids acted out the Baby Jesus story and then they each got pajamas that were given to them from Deanna and Dave. Finally, they set out their stockings, left goodies for Santa, and then went into Evelyn's room for a slumber party. It was a fun night.

Christmas morning was pretty typical. The kids got up and saw their stockings, then came upstairs to see the presents that Santa left for them. We sorted presents into piles and then went in a circle and opened them one at a time, giving ample time in between to un-package and explore the new gifts. In all it took about two hours for everyone to open stuff. It was so much fun. And of course they loved all of their presents, but I think their favorite one was a trampoline that was given to them from G&G Hazard. This was a hard one to keep secret due to its enormous size, but somehow we managed to set it up in the back yard without the kids knowing until the big reveal when we pulled up the blinds and watched the stunned expressions on their faces. It really was a priceless moment, and I wish I had thought to take a picture or something. I didn't though. I guess it was a moment reserved only for those who were there, and like so many other important moments, will have to live on only in the fragile and mutable memories of those who were present. C'est la vie.

A few days after Christmas we got our first real snow of the year, and the kids and I had a fun time building a snowman in the backyard. Everyone helped, and I think it turned out pretty good.

If you look closely you can see our new trampoline in the background.

We also went sledding. About three blocks from our house we have a golf course with great hills. They also have a club house that stays open all year long, has a small diner that serves donuts and hot chocolate, and has a window that overlooks the sledding hills. This is a perfect arrangement for us since there are usually not all seven of us who are willing to brave the elements all at once. We can all go sledding, and then take shifts in and out of the warm building while watching the others freeze- sort of like a ski lodge that specialized in selling overpriced preppy-style clothing.

Here's Ev and Jack warming up in the "lodge"

Finally, Evelyn was in charge of our weekly dessert night and she chose to do gingerbread houses. Here are some picture. By the way- the kids all voted and decided that I won for best-decorated house. I think they just saw that it had the most candy on it :).

Have a good week!

It's been a couple of weeks since I wrote here, but we've been having a lot of fun getting ready for Christmas. First of all, I have a small complaint though- we have no snow! The weather feels like Spring! Yesterday (and I'll talk more about this later) Rachel and Evelyn stood outside for a full two hours with nothing but jeans and light jackets. If you can't tell, I'm sort of bummed about this, because this is really the first year we are going to have Christmas alone as a family, and one thing I remember doing on Christmas that I wanted to continue as a family was going sledding. We have these marvelous sledding hills at the golf course just two blocks away, and yet there are still people out there every day driving balls down the range because it is still rare for us to even get a frost.

Rant over.

Last weekend we had a great time exploring downtown Spokane. They were doing a Dr. Seuss Christmas thing, with a small parade and free hot chocolate and lots of performances and stuff. It sounded fun, so we took the kids and made an evening out of it. After we were done doing all that, we walked around the large downtown mall and took in the festival of trees they had going on there. At the end, the older kids and I decided we would take the stairs to the roof where we were parked and try to beat Mom and the "Littles" who were taking the elevator. Well, unbeknownst to us there were no stairs leading to the roof (at least not that we could find), but we did find ourselves in all sorts of places that we probably shouldn't have been. The kids especially liked when we ended up behind all the restaurants at the food court. Eventually we ended up going into a door that led to a stairway only to find that we were locked in. None of the doors would open to let us out. We walked up 7 or 8 flights of stairs without finding a way out, and then descended all the way to the basement were we finally located an opening into a dark ally with lots of trash strewn about and steam coming up from the streets. It looked like a place from a dark movie, and the kids got a little scared. Finally, about 30 minutes after Mom had been waiting for us, we made it to the car (via the elevator) and drove home. The reason I write about it is because the kids are still talking about this adventure today. Good times.

We always need to get a picture inside the giant shoe

At the downtown Dr. Seuss Festival

Rachel has been getting into the Christmas spirit a little more than me this year as she has been volunteering her time and doing a lot of fun things to help those in need (maybe it's just that she has more time than I do). For the last two weeks, her and Evelyn have gone together to ring the Salvation Army bell in front of local Wal-Marts. It sounds like this has been fun for everyone, and Evelyn talks about singing, dancing, and having competitions to see who could make the most people smile. As I mentioned above, the weather has been really nice for this and I am glad they got to do that. Also, through some friends at church we were able to find out about a neat program that is going on to buy clothes for kids who come from impoverished homes in our area (even as I write that I feel a little bit paternalistic, but I don't really know how else to say it- these families are poor and need all the help they can get.) With this program, Rachel gets to go to either the mall or Fred Meyer, is teamed up with a kid who is in the program (middle school age), and then goes on a shopping spree with this kid for a couple of hours and effectively outfits them for the rest of the year with the budget she has. It sounds really neat, and I wish that I could have been a part of it. After hearing about it, I'm not sure who got more out of it, the volunteers or the kids.

Also, I have to admit here that at first this whole concept sort of bothered me. I mean, for what they were spending on each kid, they could have helped 10 others if they had lowered their standards a little bit to thrift stores, or even wal-mart quality items. This is a betrayal of how my pragmatic mind works, and I suppose that on one level I was right. But then I started thinking about it, and I realized how much this must mean to people who hardly ever got to have nice things. Is is a luxury? Sure. But I think that it really mattered to those kids and their families in a way that transcended the utilitarian goal of keeping people fed and clothed- instead of just keeping them warm, it was able to help them smile as well and enjoy a side of life that they rarely see. Perhaps this provided some hope or joy or "warmth" that a mere blanket or food drive could never achieve. Those other things happen, and we participate in them too, but it sounded really neat to be able to touch someone on the individual level and really make things special for them.

Okay. Back to our week. Sorry- my mind tends to wander sometimes.

Rachel. Besides just watching the kids and holding down a job and serving at church and keeping our house clean and making meals for us and donating time and resources to others and indulging me in endless circular conversations, she also somehow finds time for a social life. This week she hosted a "Pinterest party" (whatever that is) at our home where she got together with all her lady friends and painted glasses (like the kind you drink out of) while enjoying fancy foods and engaging conversation. I took the kids to the Kroc center during most of it, and then they were EXCELLENT children who, when we got home, went right to bed without making hardly any sounds. Rachel told me later how everyone commented on how good they were. Mission accomplished! (What they didn't know was that there was a long talk in the car and a few bribes going on behind the scenes to make this happen). 

 Well- it's Monday morning and I need to get ready for work so I'm going to wrap this up. I usually don't work on Mondays, but I am this week due to the holidays. Besides the stuff mentioned, we have been having a great time getting ready for Christmas. Widget (our elf on the shelf) has returned and the kids like finding him every morning. Last night we drove around and looked at light displays at the resort and as some of the more lavish homes in our area. We've been baking a lot of goodies to bring to friends (and to eat), and are basically just doing the whole Christmas season. It's been a fun time of year.

Happy Holidays!

Here's a few extra pictures...just for fun.

Me and My Maren

Jack did his own hair. Can you tell?

Just a few pictures of Lindsey. She doesn't do much besides lay there. She spits bubbles a lot too. Also, she can now roll over and kind-of-sort-of sit up. Life must be exciting when you're an infant.

Family relay races

What an amazing couple of days we have had.

Yesterday we woke up and had a great breakfast, prepared by Rachel. Following a relaxed morning, we got in the car and drove to the Davenport Hotel. This is a VERY nice hotel in Spokane where they had a "Festival of Trees" display. It was pretty cool looking at all the trees, and for Rachel and I it was really neat looking at the decor and architecture of the hotel. It was also fun that the kids ran into Santa Claus just as we were headed out the door.

The kid's favorite display- Pirates!

After we were done with this, we drove straight to the Christmas Tree farm and picked out our tree. This is a fun tradition that goes back to my own childhood. The kids run around and each one picks out a tree and stands by it. We then decide as a group what one to get and we take turns sawing it down. Then, while the workers shake it out and get it ready to put on our car we sit in the little warming shack and drink hot chocolate and cider. It makes for a fun outing that will be the source of many good memories.

After we brought the tree home, the kids had quiet time and then we went to a Christmas party with Rachel's "group." This was a fun night with friends and delicious catered food in a beautiful setting. After our nice dinner, we had craft tables set up for kids and the ladies talked while the guys watched kids and played pool.

The next day we woke up and had another great breakfast (thanks to your's truly) and got ready for church. After church, Evelyn and I went on a "date" to celebrate her reading accomplishments at school, and then we came home and all decorated the tree and house as a family. Can I just say that I LOVE the smell of Christmas trees? Seriously- walking in our house right now is amazing.

Once our house was decorated we had our weekly family dance, and then invited our neighbors over to watch a Christmas movie with us with the projector while we ate pizza. For dessert night Jackson and Rachel served us all some amazing chocolate fudge cake with an oreo crust and whipped cream on top (with Jack's name written in chocolate, of course).

Basically, we are totally into the Christmas season and loving it!

Also- check out these new family pictures. I love them! One of Rachel's friends did this session for us as she was trying to build her portfolio for her photography business. Camille Neighbors was absolutely amazing with our kids, and comes highly recommended if anyone is looking for a portrait photographer in the area. I think these are some of the best we have gotten.

I love this family picture- we are finally complete!

Me and my girlfriend

I can see Evelyn living in Portland or Berkley or somewhere like that one day. She just has that look- you know? I like it.

Little Miss Sunshine

This guy is going to be a heartbreaker. Also you should see this guy dance- he's got the moves!

Maren just keeps getting cuter and cuter

We tried and tried, but she just wouldn't smile. We still love her though.

I love Maren's face in this one. Addy was starting to get a little cold though.

The kids get a kick out of this one because they think they are about to kiss- really they just touched noses though.

Merry Christmas!

We just returned from our thanksgiving vacation in Rexburg. It was mostly a good visit. Here's some pics:

Thanksgiving Dinner

The creepy lynched bear that we beat with sticks until its insides fell out. Apparently this is a new Thanksgiving tradition. Gotta love it!

Not from our vacation, but Ev is pretty proud of this glitter art she did. It took her a couple of hours to finish.

This is what happens when Rachel inadvertently takes all the bottles we have to work with her and leaves me at home with a hungry baby. Don't worry- the bottle contained milk  and not juice (though it probably tasted a little bit fruity). L didn't seem to mind.