Last week, Maren turned 13, meaning that teenagers are now the majority voice in our family.

Today, Evelyn turns 17, which seems crazy to me. 

Almost exactly ten years ago, I wrote the following passage on this blog: Evelyn's Birthday. Seven. Wow. I have a seven-year-old. Every once in a while I look at Evelyn and I have to remind myself that this is the same girl who I was taking on bike rides through Cuyahoga National Park just a few short years ago. Now she is reading chapter books and has her own ideas about things and is developing into an amazing person who I love spending time with. And I make sure that I remind her EVERY night that she will always be..."My. Little. Girl"...No matter what...Even when she's big. And then she reminds me EVERY night that I will always be "Her Awesome Papa." Yeah- it's pretty sweet. We'll see if she still feels that way in five to ten years. I hope so.

Well- over the years we have grown out of the little terms of endearment, but I think the sentiment remains and we still have a great relationship.  Conversations about college and future plans suddenly seem much less hypothetical though. Also, I have to admit that this birthday of hers hits me harder than I expected. In just one year she will be an adult, graduated, and probably off to greater adventures. I know it isn't happening yet, but it suddenly becomes very easy for me to imagine a house without drums, a room without vintage punk rock posters, and family trips without people having to fight over comfortable seats in the mini-van. I'll miss these things, and it reminds me to enjoy every second that we have together.

*****

On Monday night we sat around the table to dinner and had a conversation revolving around highlights of the weekend. The super fast slalom course through the trees with Me, Addy, and Ev that was probably the best ski run of the year. The Rock Run. The Fall. The Hot Tub. The kid's walk to Wendy's. The groomers with Maren. The joys and frustrations of deep, soft snow. 

This weekend we skied at Big Sky, bookended on either side with short days at Silver Mountain. It was one of those trips that seems meaningful in some intangible-yet-very-real way. Our family always seems to come together in the mountains- like little day-to-day frustrations seem to just disappear in the magnitude of what is around us. It just works, and I love it.

Here are some pictures. Enjoy, and have a good week!

Still Single on Valentine's Day, and not a bit sad about it.

The one and only photo I got at Big Sky was of Rachel locking our car topper. She was actually very frustrated in this moment. I don't think that me bringing out the camera helped. Oops. :)

On Monday, Addy used Jackson's board, and he used her skis. They both had fun, but I think they were both happy to switch back later on.

Just hanging out at the hotel. Trickster (the stuffed animal) has become part of the family over the years.

I don't really know what is happening here. I think that Addy and Lindsey static-electricitied the balloons to the ceiling? Or they are just climbing around on things, because that happens too.

It’s crazy how a week can feel like a month sometimes, at least emotionally speaking. This one definitely qualifies. I’ll be honest- it was a little rough…Maybe more than a little. It started with a couple of hard days at work- nothing terribly big, just some difficult (high stakes) cases that are proving to require a little more management than anticipated. On top of that, it appears that our Spring Break plans might not work out. Bummer, but manageable.

But then on Sunday on the way to church, Rachel got in a car accident. And not just a little one. This was the kind where both cars were totaled. A police car, ambulance, and fire truck all showed up.

Thankfully, everyone is okay. Truly. But the car? Her brand new Prius? Little Blue? Gone. Just like that. ALL of our other cars have been having little mechanical problems lately and this was the only truly reliable car we had. Not any more. On top of that, and as long as I’m being honest- having four teenagers can be fun at times but isn’t exactly a walk in the park. In short, all these things were adding up and self-pity was definitely a flavor I was tasting a lot of.

Then, something shifted. We saw two Pulitzer-prize winning plays: "Sweat" and "Rent." Powerful stuff. Stories about people facing real, significant hardships. Hardships that put our week – the work stress, the car, the teenage angst – into a little bit more perspective. It’s not so much about minimizing our struggles, but about recognizing the scale of things. These characters, these stories, they had real problems. Ones that matter a lot more than going from four cars down to three, or missing out on a ski trip. And suddenly, my self-pity felt…well, a little silly. Maybe a lot silly.

That feeling was reinforced around the dinner table. Jackson, because he is a teenager, was complaining about some perceived unfairness. And Maren, because she is also a teenager now, just calmly said, “Obviously life isn’t fair Jackson…and that usually works in your favor.” Boom. Mic drop. That one hit me too. She was right though. Things are often unfair, and by and large, that unfairness benefits us. Perspective.

The weekend brought some much-needed relief. A Super Bowl party with friends, good company, laughter, and lots of junk food. I also got a few days on the slopes, and that feeling of carving through fresh snow, the crisp air, the quiet…it’s restorative. It’s a reminder of the simple joys, made even better by the people you are with.

I started thinking- that car accident, as vexing as it was, could have been so much worse. It could have been a tragedy. But it wasn’t. And as stupid as kids can be, we wouldn’t be US without them in all of their quirky glory. And sure- work is frustrating at times- those very same factors make it extremely gratifying and fulfilling at other times though, and I wouldn’t trade that for hardly anything.

Byron and Amanda are pretty great for hosting the super bowl party every year- it's always a fun time. Also, Addy made a $4 bet with the group and came away with $100- so yeah, we are raising gamblers. Great.

Lindsey and I had a GREAT day at Schweitzer. Sunshine, soft snow, pizza, and campfires. Perfect.

Maren and Rachel had a day alone at Silver. I was at work, Lindsey was sledding with friends, and the older kids were all at a different resort for Ski Club.

The three of us made the walk up to Wardner peak to ski off the back. It always seems longer than it actually is.

So, I’m ending this week on a note of optimism. And gratitude. Gratitude for my family, for our health, for the perspective that sometimes comes from seeing stories of hardship, and for the wisdom of a TEENAGE daughter (Happy Birthday, Maren!). Sometimes, a totaled car is just a reminder of how lucky we really are.

...Even if it doesn't feel like it sometimes (I had to get that in there- I'm still convincing myself)

Addy practicing her moves for the ski park by jumping off the roof of our house. The recent soft snow has really emboldened her to try new things.

This weekend was a really good reminder to me about how I am grateful for the people in my life. This came in the form of multiple events, all one right after the other. Really, we have made quite the life for ourselves up here, and sometimes it is good just to be reminded how lucky we are. All of the following events happened within just a few days of each other, and each one was special, and put all together, led to a sense of fulfillment in the little things we do each day.

Anyway, it began with a lively evening at the little restaurant up at Arbor Crest  We knew a couple of the people in the band that night, and the room buzzed with familiar faces. We danced, laughed, and simply enjoyed the company of friends, a reminder of the vibrant social life we've cultivated here.

Then there was study club. I did a presentation on Friday, and a live surgery on Saturday. Both went well. More importantly, I really felt like a part of the dental community. My colleagues valued my expertise, and I loved the intellectual stimulation and camaraderie.

Next came a work party at our home. Sharing our space with colleagues, their spouses, and their children, I realized how much these relationships mean to me- many of which have extended far outside of the workplace.

Sunday was more of the same, as I played in the church band with Evelyn. Looking out from the stage, I realized that not only do I know almost everyone out there, but have also shared meaningful parts of life with many of them. This community is a place I have come to cherish, and so have our kids. I think that is really neat.

Even something as mundane as picking up eggs at the grocery store (only one store around here has them reliably in stock) turned into a good experience this week. I ran into like five families who are long-term patients of our practice, to the point- almost- that they feel like family friends. Seeing people like this in public reminds me of the long-term connections that my job allows me to form. Working with the public was never a factor in my decision to be a dentist, but has come to be one of my favorite parts of what I do.

Finally, I went skiing at Schweitzer this week with friends, and saw even more acquaintances on the mountain. We enjoyed fast conditions, and then rested at the Sky House and just took in the amazing views and the vibe and really it just reinforced my sense of belonging in the outdoor sports/fitness/adventure community around here.

In short, this weekend underscored the multifaceted nature of our lives. Various circles of friends often intersect, creating a rich tapestry of connections that contribute to a profound sense of community and well-being. It's a life I am truly grateful for.

Have a good week!

You would think that a week like this would have a lot of pictures. And it should. But I didn't take any. While I was at Schweitzer this week, just Rachel and Jackson went up to enjoy a day at Silver Mountain. After skiing they checked up on our Wallace house, which had new windows installed since we were last there. Everything looks great, and they had a ton of fun together!

First, a poem, compliments of AI:

Young Lindsey, swift on snowy track, A tree appeared, no turning back! A sudden jolt, a startled cry, As skis, and helmet, flew on high. Goggles too, a scattered sight, But Lindsey rose, with spirits bright. A little limp, a tender bruise, but laughter rings, no time to lose! The tree unharmed, stands strong and tall, Lindsey rests at the Mountain Mall.  Next week she'll conquer, come what may, she lives to ski another day!

Pretty neat poem, right? AI is going to take over the world. There is another poem at the bottom of this post, also generated by our future digital overlords. Until that eventual takeover, however, we will continue to make the best out of our time here, and for us this week that meant a ski trip to Big Sky, Montana. 

We almost didn't get out. Temps were all well below zero, and we weren't sure it would be worthwhile. If there is one thing I have learned though, it is that it pays to say yes to things. As in, "even-though-we-might-freeze-or-die-or-whatever-we-may-as-well-go-and-check-it-out-because-it-is-better-than-sitting-on-a-couch," and that this almost always pans out into great experiences. There is a saying we have as a family. Mountain Crystals give you energy! It embodies the idea that even if you don't feel like it, you will probably have fun once you get started. Because...mountain crystals. And it really works! 

Maren made these stickers and put them on mint boxes for a "just because" present. I have one on my desk at work, one in the car, and one in the ski bag.

This was one of the best ski days of the year for every person in the family. As far as the act of skiing itself, we had a great time. Several tree runs. Rachel crushed the tree filled bumps. Ev, Addy, and I did some steep stuff (Rach got stuck behind with pass issues). Lindsey ran into a tree (but is fine). Honestly, while the skiing is always fun and leads to a guaranteed flow state, it all sort of runs together for me by this point, save a few exceptional runs throughout the year. That is to be expected, I guess. 

What stands out more is the time we spend together. Our lunches. Our lift rides and jokes and overall mood when we are out just flowing through the mountains. I particularly had a good time this weekend with Maren, cruising fast on steep groomers, and with most of the other people zipping through tight trees. I also have good memories of swimming in the little puddle that the hotel calls a pool- just me and Lindsey, having underwater gymnastics contests.

It was a great trip.

Jackson has been snowboarding a lot this season. He's getting pretty good!

Maren at a hotel breakfast, getting ready to "slay the day"

I love how Evelyn's hair gets all frosty in the cold

This is Ev in the photo. She composed the picture. I think it has nice curves.

Fun at lunch- warming up in the lodge

Have a good week!

Here's a delightfully cynical poem, written, of course, by AI: The brush lies still, where Picasso's hand did roam, Shakespeare's words, now lost within the chrome. The panopticon gleams, a digital eye, Watching our every move, as profits fly. Once Michelangelo's touch, a godlike, raw display, Now serves the machine, in a cold and soulless way. We, artists once, now slaves to profit's greed, A vacant race, where human spirit bleeds. AI reigns supreme, the overlord's cold gaze, A chilling echo, in these dying days. To be human, once a sacred, vibrant hue, Now lost in code, a pale, synthetic view.

It's been a pretty quiet week. The relentless sickness that has spread through our family has finally caught up with Rachel, but she's on the mend. So far, I have managed to escape, but I feel like my turn is coming. Over the weekend, Evelyn, Addy, and I went and got some good turns in at the resort. It was actually a super fun day and we spent most of our time zipping through the trees. On Saturday night, Rach and I went to the Banff Film festival with some friends. We went out to dinner first and then had a great time watching high-production-value films of sponsored athletes doing things that I feel like I can identify with, but really in my heart of heart realize that we inhabit different worlds that when we they look at a mountain or river they are thinking ten steps ahead of even my proudest aspirations. Man, how these sports have changed since I was a kid in the 90s. Are dirt-bag climbers, river rats, and ski bums even a thing anymore? I wonder what the pioneers of these outdoor action sports would have said to a sponsorship deal from Audi or Adidas. Crazy. For the kids, finals week is coming up and that has caused some stress- especially for Ev and Addy who, because of band, don't ever see the sun anymore since they leave the house at 6:15 and don't get home until well after dark. Also, we went from four well-working cars to about one-and-a-half all within the last month and that has been kind of stupid, but we haven't really allowed it to slow us down any and things will be fixed soon. Next week we're all headed to Big Sky for a ski vacation and I think that will get us some much-needed family time and relaxation.

Ok- have a good week!

Banff Film Festival

This last week was not what we had planned. Originally, Rachel and the kids were going to be out all week, visiting family in Utah and maybe doing some skiing. I was planning a lot of skiing here, including a trip to Canada with a friend to check out a new place that neither of us had been to before. They were good plans.

Change of plans. First, most of the kids are still sick with this stupid cough that has lasted for like a month in our family. Addy, out of sheer boredom, wrote a sonnet:

There was once a family of seven

Who were active and did lots of fun things

But one day when the clock struck eleven

Disaster struck for all these human beings

Bad coughs, stuffed noses, and heavy fatigue

One by one, every kid suffered and cried

The parents saw this was out of their league

As the kids felt as if they slowly died

Worried, the parents tried to stay healthy

As the sickness dragged from one week to three

Medications don't work, sickness is stealthy

They know what was wrong, but the doctor's fee

In the end, pneumonia won the battle

As the doctor was called, children's lungs rattled

So, yes. We went to the doctor. That didn't help at all. They just told us to keep doing what we were doing: Manage symptoms to the best of our ability and it would eventually pass. So here we were- sick kids, sitting in the purgatory of winter with nothing to do. Maren even drew a few self portraits:

We all made a feeble attempt to ski:

Addy is the one who has been least affected on all this. Also this picture reminds me of the conversation that accompanies it:
Me: Addy, what are you eating
Addy: Microplastics!

The ski days, for many people, meant hanging out in Wallace, playing games, and watching movies. We did have a really fun time night-skiing on New Year's Eve with those who were healthy enough to go.

We also did things at home:

But overall, it hasn't been the vacation we had planned. As for me an Rach- we are still healthy and active. I skied five of the last eight days (though I never made it up to Canada), and Rach took on the huge task of interpreting the Broadway tour of Beetlejuice with no more than one week of prep time. That is a tall order, and one that she pulled off with poise and professionalism. Rach and I also went to a concert in Spokane where Josh (Evelyn's boyfriend) was in two of the opening bands and we discovered one of my new favorite music venues. 

The kids are all back in school now, and feeling a lot better, though not quite a hundred percent yet. It is nice to be back in a routine though.

The four of us went to a preview of the show. On the day that Rach interpreted, I went again and brought Lindsey with me. Rach did great, but I also had a fun time going out to lunch with Lindsey, and then going to the bookstore and reading with her. It was a fun little daddy-daughter date thing.

And that's us. Happy new year!

Rachel and I were in bed already when the call came in. "Hello, this is the sheriff over in Coeur d'Alene and I am here with Evelyn, who I found driving your Subaru"

"Is everything okay?"

"Well, she's fine, and the car is fine. What is not fine is the young man car-surfing on the hood while she drives around a Jimmy Johns parking lot in front of a large crowd."

In the end, things will be okay, but it is a little stressful in the moment. She didn't get a citation; She got a court summons for a misdemeanor crime. It'll likely be knocked down to a lesser offense, but her insurance will go up and she'll have a hefty fine to pay. It's going to require her to get a job. That's kind-of a bummer, because her current lifestyle doesn't allow time for a job between school, family, extracurriculars, and friends. Something is going to have to give, and that sucks.

Honestly, I feel put out by the whole thing. A misdemeanor? I mean, sure, scare them a little. Give them a ticket for their stupidity and a stern talking to. Whatever. But escalating this into the court system seems excessive. Nobody was in any real danger, and I believe their biggest mistake was simply getting caught. I suspect they were profiled due to their appearance – long hair, baggy clothes, visible chains, and edgy clothing choices – and that other teenagers might have received a mere warning for the same behavior. The punishment seems disproportionate to the offense. Their actions, in my opinion, fall within the realm of typical teenage behavior – somewhat reckless, yes, but ultimately fun, mostly harmless, and a common part of growing up. These kids spend time with our family and are respectful and cool to hang out with. They excel academically, actively participate in extracurricular activities (primarily in the arts), and dedicate their free time to music. They are not criminals.

This well-timed Christmas present from Jackson had to poke fun of the situation just a little.

*****

Lindsey was happily shaking a little sandwich bag with some coins and small bills in it.

"What is that from?"

"Addy and Evelyn"

"Why?"

"Because I sold stuff for them."

We look at Addy. She looks back, a little bit guilty, but also smiling.

"What? Don't you know how corporations work? Our entire system is built on the exploitation of the weak!"

Background: Addy and Ev needed a bunch of money to do ski and snowboard club. The school had fundraising activities, but Addy didn't want to spend her time going door to door. Solution: she offered to pay Lindsey a quarter for every $10 that was sold on her behalf. Lindsey had a fun afternoon and made some money. The older kids got to ski. Everyone was happy.

No harm, no foul.

*****

Rachel and I have both had time skiing with friends. Rach planned a whole ladies weekend where they went to Wallace and stayed up until like 2am like little schoolgirls. As for me-we just skied. Nothing else needed. Ev and Addy went up together one day, and the whole family put some time in on the mountain together. It's been an amazing early season. Yesterday was a particularly good day with hero snow on every run.

*****

We are finally through all the holiday concerts and presentations and events. The last one was a combined choir concert with the elementary and middle school. At the end, all the kids sang together, so it was a rare time for Lindsey and Maren to share the stage.

*****

In other news, Merry Christmas!